The Big BAMF Theory
by bigbangsheldon
Summary: AU: Agent Cooper will get revenge against Dr. Wheaton this time. Six years ago he was defeated and now he is back, and a greater agent than ever, his team is stronger than ever, he is coming back with a bite. This time he will have Amy by his side, this time he has the advantage, this time he will win. There's no such thing as too much black latex. Inspired by a typo.


The Big BAMF Theory.

Amy was walking up to the Los Robles chamber, today was a big today in her life. Possibly the biggest day so far, she was very excited and very nervous. The team had been working for over three years for this day, and now it was finally here. She checked herself in the mirror, her cleavage and her caboose looked killer in this outfit. There was no such thing as _too much _black latex. She coded in the secret passcode to their chamber, "Good day _Mr._Wolowitz." She said, Wolowitz was their computer monkey, a simple engineer he could never face the action, but they appreciated his work. He could never by any chance be up to their standards as an agent.

"Hello, Agent Fowler." Wolowitz said to her, "Lookin' good." He winked.

Pathetic attempt at flattery, Amy mused. "Thank you; have you seen Agent Cooper yet?"

"I assumed he would be with you," He raised his eyebrows suggestively at her.

"Ahhh, well he was with me, but he left to get here early. No sign of him?" She frowned.

"No, sorry." He answered. "You've gotta find him though, agent."

"I will, he's probably nervous, perhaps scared even... you do recall what happened last time we were in face with ." She sighed; it had been a terrible day.

"I do, I do...How could anyone forget?" He frowned; it had taken Agent Cooper a long, long, time to recover, physically and emotionally.

"He certainly can't, I will find him, please gather the rest of our team, Wolowitz." She demanded.

"Anything for you, Agent Fowler."

* * *

_About 6 years previously: _

_Sheldon was on the ground, completely down on his back. He had huge wounds, bleeding, the blood was pouring out like a water-fall of the dark red liquid. He had one rather large one on his back, one deep one on his chest, a huge slash on his leg and many cuts on his arms. He was almost certain he wouldn't make it through this. _

_Dr. Wheaton had done it; he and Agent Cooper have had a never-ending feud for what felt like since time began. In reality it had been about 15 years. And now he had finally got Cooper down._

_Dr. Wheaton was creating something that would eventually destroy everything, he would become a ruler. Sheldon desperately wanted it off him, he wanted to destroy it. Wheaton had also created many other things that Sheldon wanted from him, desperately, things that would make him a billionaire. He could care all he wanted about saving the world, but he still wanted money. _

_And now, here Sheldon was possibly about to die. It had starting raining, (of all the clichés he couldn't have wished for a worse one) and Sheldon was in a pool of his blood. Sheldon threw up; he wasn't ready to die yet. _

_Dr. Wheaton had got his men to beat him, and whilst he was able to fight many of them off, they had knives whilst Sheldon only had his empty gun and his fists. When Sheldon had fallen to the floor, they had left him for dead, returning to their master. _

_Sheldon had suddenly seen a bright light, and was sure he was dead. Sheldon fell unconscious. _

"_Oh my God!" Amy wailed._

* * *

_(Still in the flashback, all italics are in flashback)_

_The next thing Sheldon knew, he was in a hospital bed, tied up to all kinds of machines. Staying silent he gazed around the area. It was night time and it seemed as if nobody was in the room. Sheldon wasn't even sure if he was alive, was this the afterlife? Because if it was, it certainly felt like hell. _

_He began to cough, and his head was in severe pain. "Ugh," He groaned. _

_Amy awoke at the sound, jumping up she said, smiling. "Sheldon, you're awake!" _

_Sheldon half-smiled at her, "So it seems." _

"_You were asleep for a week." She told him, she had missed speaking to him. "I was worried." _

_Sheldon looked up at her, as he was about to speak he started to cough again. "Can I get you anything?" Amy asked. _

"_Some water would be nice." He replied. _

"_Anything." She said as she went off to get water, she began to get teary as she walked away, she was certainly glad that he was alive but she hated seeing him like this. _

_Sheldon was very glad Amy was here, she was his one true friend, his one true everything. Amy was the only one in their team, who he allowed to call him by his real name, and not Agent Cooper and she did the same, usually when they were on the job they referred to each-other as Agent-Cooper/Fowler but in their own private places they called each other Sheldon and Amy. The rest of the team knew their names, but respected them enough to call them by their Agent names. _

_Amy came back with his water, "Sheldon can you sit up?" _

"_I can try." He then realized something, "The bed it comes with a remote, I can sit myself up with it." _

"_Oh, of course it does, here it is." She said passing him the remote, Sheldon sat himself up._

"_Thank you," He took the water from her. _

"_Do you remember what happened?" Amy asked. _

"_Obviously, I have an eidetic memory." Sheldon said, proudly. _

"_Can you tell me about it?" She said, reaching for his hand. _

_Sheldon nodded, and began to tell her every detail._

* * *

_A few weeks later, Sheldon was allowed to leave the hospital and had made a pretty good recovery. He was still weaker than he originally was and his wounds (that eventually became scars) still needed a lot of caring of, he would have to go back for check-ups but they eventually healed, and he was very excited about being out. _

_Not much was the same after Sheldon got out, he often had flash blacks about the night and it scared him. He started to go to therapy to help make it stop, and after 2 years it had worked. The anger from the night had never left him though, and the memory was always there. He had to get revenge. _

_A lot had happened in the 3 years after since the incident. Not including Sheldon's major recovery, Amy had moved into his place as soon as he had been able to get there. They had gotten extremely close over the years, Amy was too afraid to even leave Sheldon for a moment. They had gotten married 2 years after the incident, and everything seemed to be going good. That was until one night 3 years after. _

"_Amy, I have to do it." He said looking down at her. "I have to end Wheaton." _

"_No, Sheldon you can't," She replied, "We can't go through what happened last time again." _

"_It'll be different this time, I promise." He assured her, "I will plan ahead, we will plan ahead."_

"_But, you almost died." Amy said, the thought of losing him feared her. _

"_I know, but I will not go against Wheaton until I know his weaknesses and I am fully prepared again, this will have complete strategy." Sheldon assured. _

"_I don't know, Sheldon." Amy frowned._

"_I cannot live truly peacefully until I know that son-of-a-goose is dead, and gone." Sheldon assured. _

_Amy knew this was something he was very serious about, and he probably wouldn't let it go until the end of time. He would blame her forever that he didn't get his revenge. "On one condition, I come with you." _

"_I can't let you come with me Amy, you will be in danger." He said_

"_So will you, just let me come. I know what I'm doing, plus I need to be there." Amy slightly smiled, "You need me there."_

"_Fine, but if you are in danger I will remove you immediately." Sheldon smiled back at her. _

_Amy put her arms around his neck and kissed him lightly. "We are back in business then, Agent Cooper." _

"_Indeed," He said, bringing her in for another kiss._

* * *

_Sheldon had gathered his team back up, he was glad to get back to work and so were they. Sheldon had begun working out again hard-core every day for hours, and so had everybody else (Wolowitz excluded, he was a mere engineer.) _

_Wolowitz had started to get the station back together, repair the vehicles they had, they had gotten all their guns back and had invested in new ones. This time they would not run out of bullets. Wolowitz had invented some clever tricks to get Wheaton; the gang now had much more weaponry on them than before. It was thrilling. The technology they had now was outstanding; they could track each-other at all times, and send a silent "buzz" to every person in case they were in need of back-up. Their monkey had done an excellent job. _

_Hofstader, their main pilot had been trained to fly even sharper, faster. His helicopters had more tools on them than ever and he could easily locate somebody and save them as quickly as he could. Much quicker than last time, if he had this helicopter last time, he would've saved Sheldon before he had. _

_Yes, everything was looking great for the team; they were steps ahead of Wheaton. The best thing is that, Wheaton didn't know they were coming. Their base was super-secret and no messages were able to be seen from it. The team had sworn to absolute secrecy (which they would've kept otherwise but Sheldon wanted to be careful, he made them sign The Agent Agreement, breaking it was punishable by death), not telling a soul, they weren't allowed to discuss it outside HQ. It was the perfect plan to get Wheaton back. He had no clue what was coming his way._

* * *

_Nearing the day Sheldon became a bit distant which was no good, this was when the team needed him most. However, they understood his need to be alone. Amy had tried to convince him to come but he just asked for privacy, eventually she gave up but she worked extra hard in the station to assure everything went according to plan for him._

_It was the night before the start up launch of the project they had put all their sweat, tears and blood into over the past 3 years. Amy was undoubtedly nervous and Sheldon wasn't helping. _

_Sheldon and Amy were lying in bed together when Sheldon turned to her. "Amy, are you awake?" He whispered. _

"_Yes Sheldon, I am having trouble getting R.E.M sleep." She sighed. _

"_As am I." Sheldon put his arms around her. "Amy, I have to admit that I am" -he gulped –"scared."_

"_We're all scared, but we have to go through with it after all we have done and the money we have spent to improve ourselves." She answered, she lightly stroked his face. "You can't give up now."_

"_No…I can't." He frowned. _

"_It's going to be okay." She smiled. _

"_We need to sleep," Sheldon said._

"_Yes, indeed." Amy agreed, "Good night."_

* * *

Amy was looking everywhere for Agent Cooper, he seemed to be nowhere to found and she couldn't believe it. She hoped that he hadn't ditched them, she would never forgive him.

Amy realized she could use the tracking device on him to find him, _how could I be so stupid? _

When Amy had followed Sheldon's moves she found him in the recovery room, it had a bed and the basics for if somebody got a small cut.

"Are you ready Sheldon? " She asked "The team are waiting for us."

"I don't know Amy." He frowned.

"Don't back out now Sheldon, if anyone can do this it's you…" She sighed, "You're one hell of a bamf."

"Bamf? Amy is this new slang that I am not up to date with?" He asked, raising his eyebrows at her.

"Sorry, it means bad-ass mother-fucker." She explained.

"Oh." Sheldon said, smiling….. He liked the sound of that.

She noticed his smile, "See you can do this, you bamf."

"I love you, Amy." Sheldon said.

"And, I love you… let's go." She said grabbing him.

"I like your outfit, it makes you look bamf." Sheldon told her.

"That's not how you use that Sheldon." She giggled.

* * *

A/N: This was supposed to be a one-shot but I have more story to tell than I thought, oh dear lord who lets me get ideas, somebodies typo turned into this. Who lets me write? I know things are kind of OOC but this is a huge AU and it's only for fun, I promise. It will only be a few chapters and I hope to get them up fast and if I don't you can kill me. Now, be a BAMF and leave me feedback.


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